How Blonde Was She???

She was Soooooooo Blonde .
* She thought a quarterback was a refund.
* She thought General Motors was in the army.
* She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
* She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
* At the bottom of an application where it says "Sign here:" she wrote
"Sagittarius."

She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
* She took the ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
* She sent a fax with a stamp on it.
* Under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics."

She was Sooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
* She tripped over a cordless phone.
* She spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said "Concentrate."
* She told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK."
* She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

She was Soooooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
* She studied for a blood test.
* She sold the car for gas money.
* When she missed bus #44 she took bus #22 twice instead.
* When she went to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left,"
she turned around and went home.

She Was Sooooooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
* When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
* She thought if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
* She thought that she could not use her AM radio in the evening.
* She had a shirt that said "TGIF," which she thought stood for "This Goes In Front."

AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE:

She is sooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
She thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.

LOL!!!!

Like it.....
But them I'm a redhead and have had plenty of teasing over the years too..

As a blonde, I like them...but I'm not sure I understand them all...

That's ok, I'm a blonde too Doc!!! We are blonde, we don't have to understand them!!!


ROSE

It does rather take the pressure off...

I always liked the one about the blonde who finished a jigsaw puzzle in just 6 months when the box clearly read

3 - 5 years

How do you make a blonde laugh on Friday?
Tell her a joke on Monday.


Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers once a month?
Because the label says, Good for up to 20 pounds.

Why don't blondes like to make Kool-Aid?
Because they can't fit 8 cups of water into those little packages.

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand.

Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is ok. She replies yes. He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house.

He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat. She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said to achieve best results, put on two coats.

Well, she DID put on two coats. So why was it so difficult to paint?

THE BLONDE

Okay, enough! This blonde is ready to MOVE ON!

ROFLOL

You know what is scary about these blonde jokes, there are actually people out there who do some of these things. Got to love it.!

So what are you saying, Groucho? Don't be making me defensive now!

Hey Doc,
Remember I am blond too. I don't think it is blonds!! We are just the ones who can take the brunt of it!!

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's Finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's A tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then "
He sighed......... ....... "Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the box .


katie42

That is a good one!

A plane is on its way to Cape Town when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class and sits down. The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket She then tells the blonde passenger that she's paid for Economy and that she will have to go and sit in the back The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Cape town and I'm staying right here!"

The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and co-pilot that there is some blonde bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won't move back to her seat.

The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for economy she is only entitled to an economy seat and she will have to leave and return to her original seat. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Capetown and I'm staying right here.

Exasperated, the co-pilot tells the pilot that it was no use and that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest this blonde woman that won't listen to reason.

The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this, I'm married to a blonde, and I speak blonde!"

He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says "Oh, I'm sorry- I had no idea," gets up and moves back to her seat in the economy section.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss.

The Pilot replied "I told her First Class isn't going to Cape Town"

LOLOLOLOLOL,

This might be the best one so far!!! The puzzle of the Tiger is pretty close though!!!


Katie42

Three Girls in the Desert

A blonde, brunette and redhead are in a desert. The brunette says, "I brought some water so we don't get dehydrated." The redhead says, "I brought some suntan lotion so we don't get sunburned." Then the blonde says I brought a car door." The other girls said, "Why did you bring that?" Then the blonde says, "So I can roll down the window if it gets hot."



Katie42

Blonde in a Swimming Race

A blonde, brunette and a redhead had a breaststroke swimming race across the English Channel. The brunette came in first, the redhead came in second and the blonde never finished.
When the blonde got in the lifeboat she said, "I don't want to be a tattletale or anything, but the other two used their arms."



Katie42

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Katie42,

Sigh.